My Tribute to Mom Rutt

It seemed a random place to move;
that house on Dahlia Street.
But then a mighty storm came through;
and caused us all to meet.

This Christian family called the Rutts;
Were unlike those we'd met before.
They were so in love with Jesus;
We had no idea what God had in store.

God had a plan right from the start;
Of which you, Kathleen would be a part.
We, sisters three would need to know;
the love of Jesus, which you did show.

You opened your home and opened your heart;
to all the neighborhood kids around.
We'd sit on the floor with eagerness;
as your stories of Jesus would abound.

A flannel board with songs and verses;
We would love to sing.
"His banner over me is love" and;
To follow Jesus is the most important thing.

With our mother needing to work;
And our dad now gone;
Sharmon, Lauri and Heidi's life
had seemed to go all wrong.

Great pain then filled our hearts;

And we didn't know what to do.
One special night at the Rutt's we stayed;
And asked Jesus into our heart's we prayed.

Even though hard changes did hit our lives;
And we did seem to stray.
Mom Rutt, you continued to intercede for us;
Until consumed by Jesus we would stay.

The seeds you planted so long ago;
They did not blow away.
They grew and produced a yield of;
Thirty, sixty and hundred fold, even to this day.

My heart rejoices before our King;
For all the love you have shown.
I honor you this day dear Mom;
as our loving Father does from His throne.

Now that so much time has passed;
I can clearly see.
That meeting you that summer's day;
wasn't random after all, but a part of divine destiny.

I'll love you for eternity,

Kelli (Sharmon Samuels) Young

My God Purse

Ok so I confess, I am a gadget geek and lots of those infomercials for items guaranteed to make your life easier, definitely attract me. In fact, I have thought about starting a newspaper column. I would purchase and try out these "if you order in the next 3 minutes you will get not only one for this outrageous price, but two complete sets" and then report to the public whether or not they really work. Of course it is still in the some day stage, as who has the money to invest in all those gadgets.

One night a couple of years ago, the perfect item came on the TV and I knew then that this was indeed the smartest and coolest idea I had seen yet. I am a typical woman in some ways; like when it comes to matching your purse to your outfit. It has appealed to me and I have tried to do it, but after shoving all the items in one purse and into the other, I found this form of typical wasn't for me. That is until I saw the Miche Bag infomercial. I was glued to the set. This intelligent woman had come up with the idea of a lifetime. Instead of taking all your items out of the bag, you simply change the cover of the same base bag. The ideas for the covers are then endless. I loved it the moment I saw it, problem was I didn't have the money to buy it.

Fast forward two years later, when out of the blue I decide today is the day I am buying my Miche Bag. This was just a few weeks ago and I did it even though I still didn't have the money. I was excited the day I ordered it and even more so the day it arrived; complete with four shells. I discovered almost immediately, I needed a couple of accessories to go with it, but that would have to wait.

Two weeks later, payday came again. I briefly contemplated getting my accessories, but I knew it was house payment payday and that probably wasn't wisdom.

I went to Starbucks, had coffee and visited with my pastors. After I came home, I accessed what I needed to get done, since I was gone all morning. First, I would need to check my computer. As I started to open it, I heard the Lord say, "Go to Hallmark and get your accessories."

Um, I am thinking my flesh is talking to me now. "Lord, I can't really do that. I haven't even paid my bills yet and it just isn't a good time to do it with all the work that I need to get done."

"I want you to go to Hallmark and get your accessories."

Ok, I know the Lord's voice and really I don't even want to leave the house. After coming home hot from Starbucks, I was enjoying being in my cool home; yet I somehow felt compelled. "This sure isn't what I would think you would say Lord but ok." I grabbed my new Miche Bag and headed over to Hallmark to pick up my accessories.

I picked up the accessories and thought; I should go over to the card aisle and get an anniversary card for our 30^th anniversary this weekend. It is not unheard of for me to forget to buy a card for such an occasion, so I am thinking I will be ahead of the game on this one.
I head over and started browsing through the cards. One after the other and nothing was really speaking to me. I could see a lady out of the corner of my eye and then before I knew it she was standing right next to me. In another second she had moved to my left side and just starting talking to me about her upcoming wedding on the following day. I congratulated her and we chatted for a few more minutes. I said God bless you and went to the cashier to pay for my three items.

As I stood there handing over my debit card, I heard the Lord again. "Go back and pray for her."

Of course I didn't argue a bit and said, "I will do that right away, Lord." Not. I said, "Lord, I just left her and that would be awkward."

"Go back and pray for her."

This time I picked up my bag and headed straight back to her. "Excuse me, what is your name?" She told me her name and then I asked her if I could pray for her.

To my surprise, she said I was the second person to ask her that in two days. She then asked if she could tell me a story and of course I was eager to hear it. She told me how she had attended a Christian church and had lots of friends until she got divorced. At which time they all abandoned her, and she had been deeply hurt. I apologized and said I was so sorry that had happened to her. Now she had grabbed my neck and was hugging me. I prayed for her, broke off the judgments, asked the Lord to heal her heart and free her to enter into her new union. God was surely present in that aisle of the Hallmark store. I had the opportunity to share how precious she was to Jesus and how much He loved her. We exchanged numbers and then I left.

As I was walking out the store, I marveled at God and how He would use my Miche Bag to get me out so that I could minister to this lady. It made me wonder if He put that desire for this purse in my heart two years ago, knowing that this woman would need ministry on the day before her wedding. I also marveled at how free I had become in Him to allow Him to move me in a totally non religious way. In the past, if I had heard Him speak to me like that, I would have assumed it was the devil tempting me to be irresponsible. I don't live under that legalism anymore and as a result, a woman's heart was touched for eternity. O and I have a really cool story to go with my God purse!

Perpendicular Tombstones

It was a perfect day to be outside. The Arizona sun was shining within the expanse of a beautiful blue sky and the temperatures hovered around the seventies. Every now and then we get to be privy to opportunities that can and are intended to change our lives. This would be one of those days.

Just a few days before, I received a phone call from my dad and he asked me if he could take me somewhere. I asked where and he said it was a surprise. I tried to get him to divulge the whereabouts and he wouldn't budge. He said I would just have to wait and see. I am not really fond of the whole surprise thing, but it wasn't up to me.

So the day arrived. Dad was very prompt and picked me up when he said he would. We chatted a little along the way, but really not much was said. I pondered to myself where he could be taking me. We probably drove close to an hour between where we both lived to the far west side of town. Dad slowed down and as I looked I noticed we were pulling into a cemetery. What? I couldn't believe this was it! I think truthfully I had hoped for a little more. Again I probed and he just drove around until he got to the spot he intended. We got out and walked over to a specific area where many tombstones lay close to one another.

I asked him why he brought me all the way across town to a cemetery. He proceeded to ask me if I wanted to hear a story that to him, was the most Christian story he had ever been told. I was all ears then, because let's just say my father and I don't see totally eye to eye when it comes to spiritual things.

He asked me if I noticed anything unusual about the tombstones. I looked and said yes. I noticed that there was a plot with imbedded tombstones that were all facing east. However, along side of them, lined up perpendicular, were upright tombstones with crosses on them. As I looked at them I realized these tombstones had names of Muslim individuals, even those I had personally known. Now my curiosity had more than piqued. You see my father was once married to a Muslim lady named Amina. She and her family were very close and they got together often. Many times when my sisters and I would go to see our dad, we would attend these family gatherings. I had been privileged to get to know this family and love them. As a believer myself, my heart was very excited to see all the crosses on these tombstones.

Amina's brother Robert, even though he was a Muslim, married a Christian Baptist lady. He agreed to attend church with his wife, although he had to sit on the front row. The pastor was right in front of him. Robert recited his own Islamic prayers as the pastor preached. Now I have known many pastors personally in my day and yet I can't imagine any of them being willing to do what this pastor did. Robert prayed his Islamic prayers loud enough for him to hear and the pastor did nothing! He allowed this man to go on week after week and never said a word to him, but loved him as he loved all who attended. This action caught Robert so off guard, that he made a decision to accept Jesus Christ as his own personal Lord and Savior. He had been so touched by the pastor's unconditional love for him; a type of love that he had never experienced before, that he made a radical decision that would forever change his life and the generations to follow. As a result of this action, Robert became a true lover of Jesus. By the time I met the man as a junior high girl, full of herself, I might add, it was evident my Uncle Bob was a man who lived for Jesus. He hadn't raised his children as he had been raised, but they were raised as Christians. The light and love of Christ was in this family.

In time, Uncle Bob's conversion led to others in his family accepting the gift of Christ's salvation as well. I now stood before these perpendicular tombstones marveling at how the life of one man can impact generations. This precious pastor probably never had the privilege to stand where I stood that day and understand how his decision to accept my Uncle Bob, for who he was, had forever changed the course of history. I know that someday he will know, but for now hopefully my life and the lives of those privy to this story will love as he loved. By the way, my stepmom died young of MS and her tombstone also bears a cross.

Treachery Defeated!

The trail is treacherous this morning. The sun should be shining, but instead darkness reigns in its place. The threat of death surrounds me like hungry wolves hiding in the shadows. They lie in wait for the One who covers me to leave. I find myself sensing death and wonder if I will be devoured, yet I have a Savior who is by my side. I must find my strength not within myself, but within Him. I shall not be devoured, He says to me. I stand up and face my enemy, not because of who I am, for I know in myself I am small and insignificant and not a threat to him. It is because because of the might, power and glory of the One who stands tall and secure and completely confident, that victory is ours. It is in that greatness I am able to not only endure, but to win!!!

By the blood of the Lamb

I have overcome

By the blood of the Lamb

I have victory

Love Self

I woke up this morning at 5 a.m. The cat was pawing at my face, which reminded me that my head was still hurting. I needed to get up, tend to the cat and take some Excedrin. I sat up on the couch for a while and my mind started listening to God's heart for me. I had a song about love rolling through my mind like a record skipping. From there my thoughts drifted to the Ten Commandments and finally landed on the greatest commandment. "Love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, mind and strength and love your neighbor as yourself." The other morning I awakened saying out loud that the most important thing is to love God and love people. Now today the Lord pointed out another piece to that truth. Love yourself. It is so easy to look right past that, but doesn't it say to love God and self and people. I think we have been trained to believe that to love self would be wrong. It would be thinking too highly of ourselves or not denying ourselves the way we should. It would be a subtle form of pride. Isn't it interesting how we come to believe such lies? It doesn't take much to learn to despise ourselves because when we compare ourselves to what we "think" we should be, we fall so short. Maybe we don't deserve love because of what we feel we have done, or aren't pretty or handsome enough or smart enough. There are a myriad of ways we are conditioned to buy into the lies. It is time to recognize that is what they are. If we believe those lies then how can we receive the love of God because we will think He couldn't possibly love this mess. When we can't receive love, how can we give love? We can only give away what we have. A precursor to loving God is receiving His love. We find out that His love is completely unconditional. While we were still unsaved, He loved us. It wasn't after we got our act together, because that would never happen. He loves us and wants us to love ourselves. When we truly love ourselves we have received the love of God. It is only then that we are able to love Him back and then love others. So how are you at loving self?

Go to the Ant You Sluggard (It's not what you think)

If you are like me, you sometimes find yourselves praying that God will help you change a habit in your life. I remember praying for patience once and not long after that my child drops a half gallon of red Koolaid all over the floor. Are you kidding me? Then I go to the store in a hurry to pick up a last minute item and run up to the check out only to discover the woman in front of me is having to put away ten items. Patience is nowhere in sight. After repeatedly going through this process, I realize God's idea of how to achieve patience and mine are two different things. My idea was more like the magicians "poof wala" I am patient and I go on my merry way. God's idea is, how many incidents in her life will she need to face before she depends on my strength to be patient through her. So after years of going through His way, patience begins to become a part of my life.

Recently, I realized I wanted to change another habit in my life. I, now don't freak out, don't normally do my dishes at night. However, I decided I wanted to change that and start doing them at night instead of in the morning. I did entitle this blog "Keeping it Real" so I figure I need to put my money where my mouth is, though it is not easy. Well, off I start "trying" to change my entrenched ways only to fail again and again. Truth is, I don't like doing dishes at night. Wait who likes to doing them at all. I guess that is beside the point. I enjoy resting after dinner and being with my family and watching tv. I have been doing it that way for years. Either God is going to work out this change in me or it isn't going to happen. How do I know that? This is not my first rodeo. Been there, done that. I know that He works in me His way and no amount of my great ideas will get it done. I surrender and choose to trust Him and wait. Question is how is He going to accomplish this change. Same way He worked patience in me; trials. Yay!

I wake up one morning and what do I see but millions of tiny ants staring back at me. Are you kidding? They are everywhere. Coming out from underneath the cabinets on the floor and all over the dishes I refused to do the night before. They have even found their way to the counters on the other side of the kitchen. Well I know how to fix them. I am not using chemicals these days in order to prevent anything from provoking cancer, so I get out my trusty cinnamon container. I discovered in the past they hate cinnamon and so I am certain this is the cure. It may take a few days dog gone it, but it will work. NOT. A week later I am still dealing with ants. These ants appear to be smarter than the last ants. They go around all the cinnamon and continue on with their assigned task. Who do you suppose sent these ants on their task? That's right God. No one could convince me otherwise. The only way to get rid of the ants is to keep the kitchen not just clean, but spotless. However, even when it looks like they are all gone and I can take a break from night time dishes, within two hours a scout has informed them, "meats back on the menu boys." (got that from the urakai on Lord of the Rings) In an instant, or so it seems, the army has invaded once again. So people wander if God has a sense of humor. I know He does. Here I am being too lazy to clean my kitchen at night and He sends me ants to change me. There is a scripture that literally says in Proverbs 6:6 Go to the ant you sluggard and consider it ways! Ok ok, I get it! I am being lazy and I am to pay attention to these teeny tiny creatures, because if I am not being to be diligent with my kitchen they will be.

Final note: I have been keeping up with the dishes and I only see an occasional scout. Last night my back hurt. I hadn't seen an ant on the counter all day, so I thought ah ha I can skip tonight and do them in the morning. Wrong again. The ants go marching hundreds by hundreds Hoorah! Hoorah!

Prolonged Waiting

After reading Ps. 13 this morning, I found myself thinking about how I have definitely wondered many times, "Why does it take God so long to answer the cries of my heart?" I have recently received a breakthrough for something that has been an issue my whole life. It was huge, yet I still fail to understand the need to wait so long. I am also waiting until the Lord puts such a passion in my heart to fulfill whatever it is He has called me to at this juncture of my life. The waiting has been excruciatingly difficult. It seems to me that the enemy works so hard on you until you just want to give up and quit believing things will ever change. I have fought this battle myself for many years. I could relate to David when he said, "Give light to my eyes or I will sleep in death." In other words, I need some revelation to carry me on the finish line. I can honestly say that there have been many times the Lord has told me a word that became a weapon in my hand against the lies of the enemy during a difficult time. Like say with the cancer battle. As soon as a diagnoses was given, immediately the enemy was there trying to convince me that I have just received a death sentence. However, the truth is, God saw in advance my future and decided to tell me, as a young mom in her late twenties, that I would live to be elderly. Have you seen my hair lately? I have a couple of white streaks that frame my face, but I am pretty sure at 48, elderly doesn't quite fit. I had a ready weapon which was confirmed time and time again that I would live and not die. Have those weapons made the battle easier? No, but without it I am certain I would've succumbed to the enemy's lies a lot more readily. David was really good at being totally honest and vulnerable before the Lord. He would question God and tell him how tired or worn out he was, but then He would affirm his trust in God. The final verses of Ps 13 say, "But I trust in Your unfailing love; my heart rejoices in Your salvation. I will sing to the Lord for He has been good to me."